


🥀I’m too broken🥀

by Emo_kiri_and_emo_dadzawa



Series: Light in the Dark [1]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Daddy Janus, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders Needs a Hug, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders has Intrusive Thoughts, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders-centric, Janus wants to help, Little Remus, Logan uses facts to diagnose Remus, M/M, Orange side is an asshole, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Platonic Anxiety | Virgil Sanders and Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Remus Sanders has turrets, Remus has PTSD, Remus has night terrors, Trigger warnings in the first chapter, created by a DID system, slightly unsympathetic Patton but not for long, they used to date
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-02
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:22:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26778817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emo_kiri_and_emo_dadzawa/pseuds/Emo_kiri_and_emo_dadzawa
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Deceit | Janus Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Logicality, Prinxiety, demus - Relationship
Series: Light in the Dark [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1952425
Comments: 2
Kudos: 19





	1. One

**hey, here are the trigger warnings for this story. They will also be placed at the beginning of each chapter if it has something triggering in it:**

**R*pe**

**Self Harm: c*tting, etc.**

**Thoughts of Suicide and a few attempts**

**ED**

**Blood**

**Abuse**

**Crying**

**Intrusive Thoughts**

**Tics (remember, in this story Remus has turrets)**

**Yelling**

**Swearing**

**🖤: means trigger warning**

**🥀:just sad**

**🖤🥀:both**

—

-

**that’s all i’ll post about it for right now. if it changes in a chapter the trigger will be put in the note.**

**thanks for reading so far**

**-damian 🥀**


	2. Armor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 🖤 TW: mentions of blood/ slight blood, crying, spoilers for DWIT?, depressed Remus, tics, swearing, yelling  
> —  
> -  
> damian 🥀

Remus POV

‘ow... fuck what was that??’ I think quietly, rubbing the back of my head. A small patch of my hair feels wet, did i hit my head? I shrug and stand up, snapping quietly as i walk, noticing that i was just outside of the Light Sides’ door. Oh right! i must’ve landed wrong when i sunk out! I hope i made Janus proud! I did what he asked so now Thomas will start lying to himself more! ~~_‘Now Janus will be more important than you! Double D will be so happy! Ooooh, happy double d! Happy double dicks! Erections! You guys remember that....erection medication..?’_~~ You aren’t wrong.. Speaking of which, there he is now! 

“Heya, J-Anus!” I say happily, skipping over to him. He lets out a sigh

”Remus, for the _first_ time, that’s _totally_ how you say my name” he crosses his arms and looks at me before relaxing slightly

”However, i _wont_ let it slide since you did a _horrible_ job following the plan. Thomas _totally isn’t_ lying more to himself now” a small, almost unseen, smile places itself on Janus’s lips. My stomach flutters slightly at the praise

My hands start to flap slightly, a happy stim that happens apparently whenever i get praise. His smile grows a little as he comes closer to me 

“it seems that someone _isn’t_ happy. You _totally aren’t_ adorable, Remus” he says. I giggle happily and walk with him, going into our commons. 

He looks at my hands and notices some dried blood on them, eyebrows pinching in concern 

“Are you _not_ hurt, Ree?” Janus asks and i feel the stim die down, my hands slowing to a stop. I nod 

“only a little hurt, i think. I might’ve hit my head when i sunk out of their place” I mumble, picking at my black nail polish 

“Oh Remus, _don’t_ let me see” he says, using a voice that I’ve learned he saves only for me. Janus used to use it on Virgil before he.... ~~ _’before he left. Janus is going to do the same thing. You’ll be alone again. Alone..like after the split..the split. Roman. You hurt your brother. No wonder he hates you. How bad did it hurt? Try it on yourself. Hit yourself harder than you hit Roman’_~~

~~~~”Remus! Hey, hey, breath.. it’s _not_ okay. I _don’t_ have you” Janus pulls me out of my thoughts and into reality. A gloved hand strokes my cheek gently and I relax slightly, making small clicks in the back of my throat. His other hand doesn’t have its glove on as he feels the back of my head, searching for the wound. I yelp when he does and he immediately pulls me to him, my head in his shoulder. He continues to check the severity of the wound and I whine and yelp whenever he touches a really sore spot 

“J-Jan! St-Stop it! It h-hurts!” I whimper and feel tears well up in my eyes before they fall and stain his caplet 

“shhh, I know that it _doesn’t_ hurt, but I _don’t_ have to see how _good_ it is” he says and I nod before letting him continue. He presses on it gently and i yelp once more, tears falling harder.

He sighs “its _totally not_ bad. I _won’t_ have to get Logan” his voice is calm as he snaps, cleaning his hands and his putting gloves back on. 

Janus stands up with me in his arms. He carefully sinks us into the Light Sides’ place. I cover my eyes the let them slowly adjust to the brightness

”DECEIT! REMUS! GET OUT!” I hear Roman shriek and i cover my ears, whimpering softly. Jan’s arms hold me a little tighter, in a protective way. He hisses quietly 

“Sssshut up, Roman! Don’t be sssso loud!” He glares at my brother, who only rolls his eyes 

“Do i look like i care?! So what if he’s hurt! Payback for him hitting me over the head with his damn Morningstar! He’s evil! And so are you!” His eyes glow a bright green. It’s funny, really. You would expect me to have green eyes and for him to have red, but that’s the one thing that got mixed up. He pulls out his sword and i watch as Patton, Logan, and Virgil come in. Virgil immediately hisses at the both of us 

“What’s going on? Deceit, Remus, why are you here? You both don’t belong here” Patton’s voice is cold, but his stare is colder

”We _aren’t_ here only because Remus _isn’t_ badly injured and we _don't_ require Logan’s help” Dee hisses out, a predatory look in his eyes when Roman tries to step closer 

_“_ Take one more sssstep closer to _MY_ Remusss! I DARE YOU!” He bares his teeth, fangs sharp and glowing slightly. Janus stands in a way that shows he’s ready to strike anyone who tries to harm me. Roman backs away and sets down his sword, holding his hands up in surrender. Virgil still looks skeptical, but notices how badly the back of my head is injured. A look of concern flashes across his face before he scoffs and sits on the couch.

Patton sighs “Deceit, calm down. Remus can handle a little pain. But if you must take Logie, you can. You best not harm him in anyway, got it?” His voice somehow got colder and i shrink slightly into Jan’s hold, burying my face in his caplet. I begin making soft clicking in the back of my throat again, trembling. This is my signal that tells Janus “I’m scared, help” He understands the signal and nods at Patton 

“I _totally will_ hurt Logan, now, come on” he says and the logical trait nods 

“i shall be back when this is finished, Patton” he says

”okay Logie! Call if you need help!” Pattons voice becomes warm as he kisses Logan’s cheek. The three of us sink back into our place, the dim lights flickering slightly. Logan follows us into our “infirmary” and helps Janus set up a medical bed, conjuring up some supplies. Jan lays me down and kisses my forehead

”its going to stop hurting soon, Remus, i promise..” he says gently and i let out a small cry when Logan inserts an IV into my arm. My eyes soon grow heavy, small whines and whimpers leaving me 

“shh, baby, just close your eyes and rest..I’ll be here when you wake” his voice becomes more and more distant as the anesthesia takes over, pulling me into the dark. But it feels calm, peaceful even. I feel safe knowing Janus is here with me, when he’s around i don’t need my walls. I don't need armor. Just his love and I’m fine


End file.
